Chapter 6

Amishi looked up to find him staring at her. He had a worried look in his eyes.

She continued reading…

… I hated that I desperately wanted someone to acknowledge me beyond my… handicap…

But then when I saw you again at the window with the breeze blowing your hair around your face, I was a complete goner. The four floor distance didn’t reduce your appeal at all!! I was spellbound…. You had me…still have me bound by your spell. It’s not just the looks beautiful. I felt I have known you since ages. Something about you speaks volumes about your soul. It’s… it’s without deceit.

 I almost spoke to you the day I came on the bike with my friend. Rahim is my best friend and the bike is his… I hesitated … I was scared…scared you would reject me right away. So just gave you that letter and fled.. That’s been my mistake beautiful, I fled…from you, from all the problems that could have come up…

But the next couple of months were the most beautiful ones of my life… communicating with you daily… I needed that more than my next morsel of food… For once in my life I wasn’t judged for my disability. For once someone acknowledged me for whom I was… the individual in me. But somewhere back of my mind I had that lingering doubt about the whole thing. I had fallen head over heels for you. When you suggested meeting I felt it was time you knew the truth about me… And when you… were SHOCKED to hear me … I saw your expressions… to say I was devastated would be an understatement. I… I just didn’t know what to say to you… I realised later that I had erred by lying…lying by omission. I take the onus upon me… it was my fault entirely.

I am so sorry, beautiful… I should have told you the truth about me… but… I guess I loved the fantasy that I was living in … I didn’t want it to end…

These last few days I kept myself away…. Telling myself, you deserved better. Someone normal… Someone who can actually have those conversations with you. Not just by messages or …letters. But it was torturous… I could neither focus on my studies nor football nor sketching… I absolutely loathed myself. I have been a douchebag for not responding to your messages. These were the most painful days of my life… I deserved it for keeping you in the dark.

So here I am. I have severe to profound nerve deafness. I use the best of hearing aids technology has to offer. I have a high IQ so with whatever my parents and professionals helped I could educate myself and have been an achiever. But there will be limitations throughout my life. For instance, you have to speak slowly looking at me so that I can lip read you even with the hearing aid. I can only follow English. In fact  I hate wearing the aids so keep them away most of the time. I have come to love silence…

This is me… with my silence. The only sound I love is the sound of your heart…that’s the sound of love for me…

I love you beautiful…I always will. Any decision you make will be respected. If you say a no…I promise you, you will never hear from me again…

Yours

Pavan Bhargava  

Amishi held the letter close to her chest and cried. She wiped her tears and looked up to see him facing the sea again. Her heart was filled with emotions and they resembled the waves she was seeing before her. She folded the letter and kept it in her bag. His back was still facing her. She rushed and hugged him from behind, burying her face in his back. He released her hands and turned around to face her. It was then she saw, he was crying too.

She went up on her toes holding his shoulders and kissed him on his lips. She lingered and looked into his eyes… . He looked at her with an intensity that caused a shudder in her body. He bent her behind and kissed her. He poured his emotions into it….she felt the turmoil in his heart…it matched hers…

As their tongues touched each other she put her arms around his neck and held him tight. He squeezed her to him as if she would disappear without that. After what seemed like ages, they separated still holding hands and their gazes boring into each other. She pulled him back to the bench and sat. He sat next to her. She turned to face him and spoke slowly, “I am glad you came clean. The other day, I wasn’t upset about your so called limitations. I was hurt because you hid the fact from me. I don’t know what would have happened if you had revealed it before we actually started communicating. But honestly, it… it didn’t make a dent in my feelings for you. In fact I am in awe of you….”

She looked away to catch her breath. Then looking back at him, she continued. “I don’t consider you disabled at all…. In fact you are a far better human being than so many abled people I know. You are brilliant, super talented… I love your sketches and your poems make me laugh… you… can read me like a book even when you don’t see me. It’s like you are my other half… You know how to improve my mood when I am upset….

… Look at yourself through my eyes… I see a strong man capable of love… I see an honourable man who doesn’t hesitate to accept the challenges of life thrown at him…. I see a man whom I have come to love more than life itself. So my decision stands…  I love you… I want to be with you…

…as for silence, you know…. what is the sound of love? Its silence. Because I don’t need sound to feel you… there is so much chaos around… we need silence to feel each other…

….i don’t find anything amiss in your speech. I can understand what you say. It’s because your heart does the talking and my heart does the listening…

…So, my dear football guy, I love you… totally…”

She could see tears in his eyes but he blinked them away. He put his arm around her pulling her close to him. She laid her head on his chest. They both gazed at the rising waters… hoping that the love between them overcame all obstacles in its path just like the giant tide that rose up in front of them….

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Epilogue

Three years later.

Amishi paced the waiting area of VIshakhapatnam International Airport. Her brother tried to talk to her to make her sit down. She was far too agitated with anxiety to sit still. She looked at the seating area and saw her parents who were chatting with Mr. and Mrs. Bhargava, Pavan’s parents and her to- be in-laws. She smiled as she saw the scene before her. Things hadn’t been so easy for her and Pavan after they confessed their feelings for each other on the beach that day.

They dated for a couple of months till he finished his degree. He got selected for MS in Massachusetts Institute of Technology and had to leave soon. He had achieved complete scholarships based on his research on Artificial Intelligence. Amishi had first told her tech savvy brothers about him. They had become Pavan’s fans and technology united them. His parents were cool about their alliance but her parents were initially not happy. But considering how serious their daughter was and when her brothers too convinced them, they agreed.

Amishi and Pavan were engaged a day before he left for the US. Pavan rarely used his hearing aids whenever they were together. They communicated with their expressions… They pushed each other to be better in their respective fields.  Two and half years fled in a jiffy.

She was now working for an NGO which helped integrate specially abled children in the mainstream society. They mainly helped with adoptions which is where she used her skills. She enjoyed working even more in this area because it hit home.  Pavan had just completed his studies and though he was offered a job straight out of campus there, he chose to return to India. He wanted to start a manufacturing unit for software programs, and her oldest brother was only too happy to partner him.

Today he was returning and she couldn’t wait to see him. Most of their communication these three years was via Skype or messages. He still wrote poems for her which made her smile but she missed him, his presence, his touch…

Today he was coming back…

Suddenly there was an announcement that the flight had landed and she waited with bated breath.

The next half an hour was sheer torture as she waited … finally there he was… He still stopped her heart the way he did three years ago. She ran the distance and he welcomed her with open arms, lifting her and turning her around. They hugged and kissed like there was no tomorrow… She was sobbing away as he tried to calm her… to the amusement of people around them.

The following month they were married.

It was the moment of triumph for the lovebirds… they had proved that love mattered most… over everything else…

They believed in their sound of love… they believed in silence….

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the end